When I think of a monster, I think of extra limbs and weird proportions

I went upstairs for the first time in a long time.  I had two purposes for going up there...actually three.  My first purpose was to have a cigarette.  It´s nice outside, so it´s definitely worth it to go places where the climate is not moderated by a thermostat.  My second was to collect a few pieces of art and to figure out what to finish and what to dispose of.  ...I didn´t really accomplish much of this.  My third task was singing.  I got up on the stage and sang to a room full of chairs and rugs...a room with wood floors and dim lights.  I sang with emotion and with great volume.  ...and I sang to no one.  Maybe someday I´ll sing for people.

I feel like I´m finally beginning to be able to find myself around town with ease.  ...and each time that I´m proud of myself for finding something with little to no GPS assistance, I realize that it´s all for nothing.  Each little bubble of excitement is popped by the knowledge that I have less than a month left here.  BAH!

I went to get a haircut yesterday.  It was the most I´ve ever spent on a haircut and I was dissatisfied with it, as usual.  It wasn´t only the fact that I don´t like how it turned out...it was how the woman talked to me...how I got to hear all about how she´s a lesbian and she can express herself creatively by cutting hair.  ...I mean, if you´re going to express yourself creatively, maybe you should be halfway fucking good at what you do...or be in some type of training program.  ...No.  She had been doing it for four years.  ...but I would also like to say that I have only ever been happy with ONE haircut that I´ve ever received.

Speaking of working on being better creatively, I have been painting.  ...I hope to paint a lot this week.  I feel like I have a lot on my ¨to do¨ list right now.  I have already begun to accomplish the tasks on this list.  I´m so happy to have an easel to paint on. ...I got one for Christmas from a dear friend...it´s one of those things...I remember asking for one from my mom...and not getting one...and I didn´t give this friend any Christmas ideas, and...I couldn´t ask for anything better.  How does someone just know someone like that?  I´m sure it wasn´t intentional...that this friend just thought it was a good idea for a gift... I didn´t realize that there was stuff in the easel I received either...and the fact that my friend also got me extra canvases...just...I know you´ll read this friend...and you have no idea how much it meant to me.  ...thinking about it now still makes me all teary.

My health is finally almost normal.  I have had a few really intense bouts of dizziness lately, but otherwise, I´m in good health (maybe getting slapped around isn´t always fun HA!).  For this, I´m thankful.  I know that these paragraphs aren´t oganized very well, but I´m not organizing or typing anything serious...so I´m just going to keep going.  I started another tattoo.  I have to wait a week and a half to get it finished.  FUCK!  In a week and a half...I´ll have a week of work left before moving (oh help me, jonny craig!).  The thought frightens me.  I´m not sure what is left to do before packing...I have a few ideas, but...I just want everything to be packed...and I need to get a bed.  I NEED A BED! fuck!  ...but I´m kind of excited to go shopping for one.

I went to Benihana tonight.  It was delicious.  A friend of mine went, too...and we sat with a family and a couple. ...it was fun.  ...and delicious.  If you haven´t heard of it...it´s a hibachi grill...yum yum!  I got steak...because let´s face it...I love me some fuckin cow.  And although I do not like shrimp or mushrooms, I did eat some...just because they´re some of those foods that every once in a while I question myself...¨I can´t really NOT like this, can I?¨  ...and then I taste it...and am reminded that I do not like these things.  I can eat onion JUST...but not mushrooms...or shrimp.  yuck.  PS, why the fuck is Barbara Streisand on the Grammys...or whatever award show that is???  Weird.


But I am going for now, since someone is coming over to play some videogames.  I hope I have some snacks lying around in case...